A light to show us the way.

 "Bring out the smelling salts Mable,,,, he's done more posts before the end of February than he did all last year" I hear you cry,,,

And what is the cause for this sudden urge for endless blogging????

That's right LAMP IRONS,,, until recently they all looked the same to me,,, ha de ha ha,,, how little did I know and that was all before I won a spurious contract to affix some lamp irons to [puts paper bag over his head so not to be recognised] a GWR 57xx pannier tank.

Getting the wretched thing into the workshop without being spotted was difficult enough but to be honest I was surprised how restful modelling at 3am was but by 4am I was totally bewildered.

Everybody else in the railway world who wants to make a lamp iron takes a 10" x 2" piece of mild steel puts a 90 degree bend in it at 2" and promptly rivets it to the footplate, smokebox or bunker,,,, 

But not the loopies at Swinedon,,,, 

Oh No No,, life was never intended to be that bloomin simple.  

 There is at least 3, yes 3 right angle bends in a GWR lamp iron and if you attempt to go for the simple version  you can expect a visit from the horse hair shirted boys from the Scalefour Society,, so best not mess about going down that route.

Now it transpires if you want to get it right you have to purchase the Affixing GW Lamp Iron's Manual from "the SS boys",, a weighty little tome which gives you all manner of detail on how they are affixed properly and best you pay attention believe you me,, I had to giggle when they suggested I rang their coordination office to get a compass reading so I could get the smokebox correctly aligned with Swinedon before commencing the operation,,, that surely is taking it all a little bit too far.

Understandably perhaps,, if you are into horse hair shirts,,, all the bends have to face in a certain direction,, to the left,,, if you are looking at it from the back and to the right if you are looking at it from the front,, and WHY I hear you ask is it all so wretchedly complicated.

Well would you believe GW lamps don't have the fixing slot at the back of the lamp they have it on one side so the access door is easily opened,,, I'm not surprised all their engines looked the same,,,, they spent so much time inventing the most ridiculous lamp iron in the world they didn't have time to mix things up a tad when it came to the  aesthetics of the locomotives.

Anyway they are done,,, I am meeting the owner in a shady layby on the A11 at some ungodly hour on a date which is non of your business and after that clandestine meeting the whole sorry saga will be behind me,,, and as we started with a picture I will finish with one,,, this is what I think of GW lamp iron technology,,,  with one simple digit finale,, believe you me I won't be doing any more!!

Kindred Spirits

 Until recently Tuesdays have always been a sort of non-day,,,, but not anymore,,, Tuesday [or Toosdy as it is pronounced locally] is Squitters Day

Now your understanding of squitters may be different to ours but in rural Norfolk parlance having a friendly conversation with friends is to have a "Squit",,so as we get together on a weekly basis to have such a meeting Toosdy's have become a day to look forward to as it is full of Squit,,,, and yesterday was no exception.

The gods were with us and for the first time since last October I spent 2 happy hours squitting in the garage and DID NOT look like one of Ernest Shackleton's minions,,, yes folk Spring is on its way!!

We have been know to have so much fun that my neighbour recently asked me what we actually get up to in the garage on a regular basis,,,in the words of that well known maxim,,,,"you've either got it or you ain't" and when the weather is balmy and wind is in the right direction just like yesterday then we definitely HAD it all,,,, good friends, kindred spirits so to speak, worthwhile conversation and my repeated ability to prove quite conclusively that the various lockdowns have had a serious effect on my Mental Wellness as I had completely forgotten how my train set worked,,, and it showed,,, much to the delight of the assembled squitters.  

As the enforced isolations appear to have finished and without a shadow of a doubt my modelling mojo has returned,,, the L1 Zeppelin continues on it's haphazard dash to the finishing line,, I'll squit no more but leave you with a few piccies of progress so far,,,, Enjoy

Happy New Year to all our readers!!!

 Well,,, [sorry,,, we can't say "Well" anymore apparently it has to be SO],, so I shall enlighten you with a little bit of progress from the frozen wastes of North Norfick.

Having found my crampons and bottled oxygen cylinder I today braved the extremes of the north face of the garage and made a concerted effort at getting the D21 finished off,,,,,[excluding paint obviously,, so there is another 2 year delay] and this is quite quick for me as I only started it in May 2020!!!

So having donned my crampons and Steptoe style fingerless gloves I ignored the Niagra nose and got stuck in to fitting all the twiddly bits,,, 2 whistles, lamp irons, balance weights etc etc I have to say I'm rather pleased with the end result,,, especially when you compare it with raw material I started with way back when.

There is something strangely satisfying in taking a crock of *rap [see the 3rd photo]and improving it to the best you can,,, and it only cost me a new set of driving wheels,, motor and gear set and a book on the Locomotives of the NER and as all the labour was thrown in for free it has turned out to be a bit of a bargain.

Well [apologies for that] it could have but this little project has kindled a bit of an interest in NER loco's and so to give it a bit of company I have bought it a Q6 as a shed mate,, and found an old DJH D16 kit which I invested in many years ago which needs a bit spare time throwing at it,,, but a bargain whichever way you look at it.

One quick tip,,,, when you are trimming all the footplate heights with bits of plastikard to get everything to line up nicely it really is a good idea to glue them into the body,,,, as you can see,,, I have learnt this lesson just this morning.

I had the body sitting nicely on the chassis and everything being square and equal etc etc until I separated the body from the chassis to aid fitting all the bits,,, there was this sudden avalanche of plastikard bits flying everywhere,,, which will need refitting and GLUING in place,,,, drat,,, no I think this deserves a double drat.

Am still waiting for exhibition confirmations but I'm sure they are on the way now we appear to be getting back to some form of normality.

Keep calm and solder on.

SAD😞

 

The Festive Season!!!!

 Rather than bottle it all up I thought I would have a little rant regarding the XMAS season,,,, mmm

Now back in my day it was always called Christmas,,, but in these uncertain Cov-Brex-itus days we have to be very careful that we don't upset anybody,,, heaven forbid,,, [perhaps that should be celestial restrictions,,, better safe than sorry.]

Since when did the festive season start in early November,,, WHY,,, we haven't even had bonfire night yet.

I listened to some plummy lady from the National Society for Maximising Seasonal Retail Profits on the radio yesterday basic blaming both Brexit and Covid,,,, reasoning that this and last years festive seasons had been obliterated by circumstances well out of her control and there ain't no way she is going to let that happen again so to give themselves a fair chance of getting back on the financial tracks they are totally committed to maximising the opportunity this year!!!!

The less than plummy interviewer [seems to be the norm these days from Auntie Beeb] asked if this was just going to be a one off seasonal market adjustment,,,,, "well one never knows does one,,, if this years campaign proves successful we may well decide to start next years Festive Season early as well".

I bet you will,,, any excuse to maximise profits,,, this wretched woman has obviously never had kids as if she had she would realise the virtue of  keeping the festive season at a very low profile for as long as possible,,, get a grip woman,,, my legs are still tanned and this years summer was hopeless and your starting Xmas,,, RIDICULOUS,,, why am I sitting here in shorts and a T shirt watching adverts about mince pies flushed down by the odd pint of Bailey's,,, the world has gone mad.

MINIRANT

How has some 16 year old Scandinavian bint suddenly become an expert on the worlds problems,,, it's all about life experiences apparently,,,, that's rich,, I bet she hasn't cruised the Valetta Gut or Hero's Square in Limassol on a Saturday night,,, now anyone who has been there will know exactly what sort of life's experiences are really important,,,, life forming,,, that's what they were!!! 

Having said that having listened to her in the Glasgey flag wavers sing song she could be a very strong contender for one of the many vacancy's at the Beeb,,,,"I fink shid do rite well and she shud seeze the opertoonity"

Just to prove that I have been spending some productive time in the garage I offer a couple of shots of this weeks efforts,,, slowly slowly,,, I'm in no rush,,, and am still waiting for a formal exhibition invite.

 

My Mojo won't come back,,,, is it Covid,, Brexit, or just me???

 I have no photo's to show of any recent progress,,, and the reason for that is I haven't done a damn thing.

At last nights assembly of the local G.O.G club [that's Grumpy Old Git's,,, not the 7mm mob] I was interrogated as to why I haven't posted anything on the Salmon Pasture's Blog for very nearly a year,,,, 

C.B.A, was my first thought for a witty response,,, "Can't Be A**ed" but later when my air of indifference had passed I had a good deep ponder and thought "is it that long ago" and the answer is YES,, very nearly a year.

Don't take it too personally as I haven't posted anything on RMWeb or the LNE site either!!

With even further thought and perhaps a bit of soul searching it is apparent that my Modelling Mojo has not so much weakened but quite simply vanished,,, the last time I did anything like constructive in the garage was mid spring,,, I was in shorts and a T shirt and all was well with the world,,, I was cobbling an N5 chassis together and it was going well,,, and as we type today it is still sitting their upside down in the testing cradle and 5 months has elapsed!!!

When I first got the layout back after it's holiday in Sunny Surrey I went beserk,,, understandable perhaps as I hadn't been anywhere near it whilst we were trying to realign ourselves in some Maltese Sunshine,,, on returning to the ancestral home it was quickly retrieved and bashed into shape,,at this stage it was suggested by the management I consider putting a sleeping bag in the garage to save a bit of time,, a sure sign of how high my level of enthusiasm had reached!!

Anyway this morning after fighting my way through all the cobwebs and "spider guano" I actually cleaned the track a bit and had a play,,,, then I was overtaken with a timely flash of constructiveness and put a new battery in my wristwatch!!! then returned indoors to find my sawn off winter modelling gloves,, I know it would have been much easier to continue throughout the summer as against mid Autumn,, but I learnt a long time ago if you aren't in the mood it is best to leave it alone co's if you don't you end up doing things 2wice which in it's way is worse than doing nothing at all.

So dear readers prepare yourselves,,, we are about to start again.

Perhaps this is a good time to mention the dreaded Covid,,, let's hope all those who are reading this have either managed to avoid it or if not recovered from it,,,, now I don't know why but I have this funny feeling in my flux that the exhibition circuit is about to start getting back to what we all desire and if so then hopefully Aylsham, Immingham and Ipswich will be in touch,,, be assured at the moment I am Covid FREE!!

 

 

Confessions of an isolated shunter

 First a couple of pics just to prove I don't spend most of my life watching documentaries on the goggle box.

The D21 is slowly progressing ,, we now have some pipes fitted to the side of the smoke box and a Walshearts pump,,[that has to be the first time I have spelt that at the first attempt,,, I just hope it is correct,,,, I'm sure somebody will let me know if not]

The tender is very nearly complete,,, as it is now sporting  a coal hole [ pronounced Koyl Oyl in south Yorkshire ] a water pickup, a brake standard and matching water scoop standard plus a couple of distinctly NER tool lockers,,,the loco boiler now has all manner of lumpy bits stuck to it and it has also been spotted blasting through Epson and Ewell station ahead of a rake of Gresley teak coaches and apart from a little bit of tweaking it didn't let me down. Yoo Hoo.

 

The Jersey Lily has become a bit of an exponent of the  paintshop Oky Koky,,,, it was prepared for paint,, see previous pics,,, and painted,,, yuch,,, with Citroen automotive black,,, which was very shiny and according to some published expert was the ideal choice for using as a base before sticking lining and transfers/decals all over it,,,the trouble was the Gallic Lacquer obliterated all the detail I had spent hours installing,,,so after looking at it for 6 months and trying to convince myself it wouldn't be that bad after I had weathered it I had a sudden rush of the common senses and threw it back into the Nitro Mors,,,, again,,,, I'm convinced it would not have happened if I had used the old reliable British Leyland Austin Allagro/Montenegro Black but what's the point of dragging all that up again.

So here we are again,,, having destroyed most of the handrail wire whilst gently coaching the paint off with a soft tooth brush I am roughly back were I was in March,,,, but so what,,, I've nothing else to do.

 I am also pleased to report it has also been seen blasting through Epsom and Ewell station but with slightly less success than the D21,, in that it got a tad warm and started to smell like my father's old Bush radiogram after I had forgotten to turn it off,,, for a couple of days,,, I'm not surprised it got hot,,, those 1970's McGowan kit castings were sourced from the left overs from the Forth Rail Bridge,,, that is one heavy loco and a real ballast crusher,,, but on the pastures if it can negotiate 12' of track twice a day at exhibitions I will be happy with that,,,, especially considering I started it in 1994!!!!

THE CONFESSION BIT

When I entered the garage at about 5 mins past 10 this morning,,[having just watched The World at War for the umpteenth time,,, the documentaries are good but that music still gives me goose bumps] I had every intention of being productive and even got as far as running the D21 into the fiddle yard to allow me to pick it up and proceed to the workbench with it,,, that was my first mistake,,, I should have just picked it up but NO I had to clear a route for it and make some space as well,,, you all know what happened,,, 2 hours later I was still clearing space for it and having a great time playing with my trainset,,, for the first time in age's,,, do I have an excuse,,, NO and I don't need one,, I was having a great time and I cannot remember the last time I had so much fun being not productive!!!

WHAT A GREAT HOBBY THIS IS!!!

Quick memo to Mr Blogspot,,,, I don't like your up-graded blog insert image thing,,,, on the old system you could choose what size of pics you wanted,, standard, large or extra large,,, now on the improved system you have to fanny about with sliding digiwatsits,,, [that's 21st century latin] and if your not careful your Jersey Lily can suddenly become an inflated sausage loco or even worse a top heavy thumper,,, don't tell me,,, it's progress and what all your users have been requesting. 

Rubbish!!

Full speed Ahead, and Astern,,,, why not.

 Is it just me or is anybody else confused about what we are supposed to be doing????

I was getting all excited about treading the boards again at an exhibition,, Aylsham it was,,, and it should have been this weekend,,, but unfortunately due to the Kung Flu it understandably got cancelled.

Then within a couple of days of being told the Aylsham show is ORFT,,, I receive a message from Ipswich asking me if I would like to do their exhibition,,, YES YES YES I reply very posty hasty and they advise they are delighted to hear that I will but they cannot actually tell me when it is,,, due to the Kung-Flu,,,, ah well,,, a definitely possible show in the future has to be better than no show.

Birds in the bushes spring to mind, but these days we bloggers have to be especially careful about what we actually post as we certainly don't want to upset anybody,, so for all the wide awake enhancer's who may be reading I am actually musing about a turdus merala I spotted hopping about in my recently acquired ribes uva-crispa bush this morning. [that should keep them occupied for a bit]

You just can't beat a bit of culture,,, some modelling pages wax lyrical about,,, cricket scores,,, others find the various shades of battleship grey totally absorbing but here on the pastures we go for a bit of 4mm latining and why not as I've not actually done any modelling of late,,, in fact for Yonks,,, but you have probably noticed that,,,excuses,, crickey where do I start,,, just take your pick from any of this lot:

I got a blister right on the end of my blogging finger,,,or,, my blogging glasses fogged up and I just couldn't see what I was doing and before you could yell "self isolate" it was time for bed,,, or,,, my all singing all dancing model of an LMS dark and swarthy class 5 fell on my foot and I haven't been able to move since, or or or,, the real reason is that I just couldn't persuade my glutus maximus extremis to go into the garage,,, well to be quite honest  I have definite suspicions that if I go into the garage and indulge in some serious self isolating by the time I've dusted down the soldering iron I will find I am in contravention of the latest rules regarding self isolating and could possible incur a £10,000 fine!!!

What to do????

I have decided to throw caution to the wind and go in there anyway and if I get caught and fined then you won't be hearing from me for some time as the possibility of me paying off such a fine are about as remote as a politician actually answering a question.

As my old driving instructor used to say,, "u turns can be very dangerous"  as demonstrated above,,, and hopefully this long delayed blog has proved I am not yet kicking up the bellis perennis but could be quite soon as the 2 official reprimands I have received for a distinct lack of blogging have come from very dubious sauces,,, 1 models the GWR in 7mm and the other isn't even a modeller just somebody who lurks about in my murky highly confused past,, enough said,, and you both know who you are.

QUICK UPDATE

I have been in the garage today,,, have found my mojo which was hiding under the sheets of plastikard and all should resume very shortly,,, as we have an exhibition to get ready for,,, honest .. but there again I'm in no rush and sincerely hope you aren't either.